How are you managing this year?

It’s the last month of the year, and I thought a check-in would be appropriate. The past two years have been an uphill journey. Many have lost more than they thought possible, have experienced tremendous setbacks, and our mental health has been pushed to the limit. More often than not, I find myself desperately hoping for a day with no challenges, no disappointments, no setbacks. I need a break, not a break from my family and work, but a break from the negativity.

As we prepare for 2022, as we dream of what the year will hold, we must make it through the last stretch of 2021. I call this the marathon push. Between the holidays, work, family, and life, we are lucky if we can take a five-minute break. Tensions are high, finances are tight, and our stress levels have reached an all-time high. I know there are moments I feel so tightly wound up, that one more thing could cause me to explode.

Checking In

Tell me how you are doing. Are you making yourself a priority? Are you eating well, eating enough, and making sure to eat every day? What about sleep? Are you setting a bedtime routine, working to get between seven and nine hours of rest a night? How is your mental health? Do you have a safe place to vent? Do you feel safe? What about your emotional health? Are you happy-go-lucky, or a second from an anger explosion, or are you on the brink of crying? Physical health? Do you struggle with headaches, aches and pains, tummy pains?

These may seem like a lot of questions, but if you take the time to answer these questions, you will have a pretty good idea of where you are and what you need. Knowing what we need, knowing how to care for ourselves, doing daily check-ins takes the power away from the challenges and places the power back in our hands. When we know and acknowledge we are exhausted, we are claiming the feeling, and taking any control exhaustion could have in our lives away from it. So when you feel like you are about to lose your patience, scream at everyone, and then cry, and you ask yourself why you feel this way, your subconscious mind can answer because you are exhausted. This one change places you in control and gives you the ability to not react. It’s pretty simple, but a guaranteed win.

How often should we check in?

At the very minimum, you should check in with yourself daily. A friend once told me, we spend more time worrying about our cars, maintaining them, checking fluids, and watching for lights to come on than we do checking in on ourselves. If this rings true for you, then it is time for a change. Make a daily check-in part of your morning routine. Every day as you drive into work, use your car as a reminder to take a daily inventory or check-in of yourself. As you go through your day, if something feels off, or you have a reaction that is not normal for you, stop and take an inventory. Ask yourself why you reacted that way while reminding yourself that there is no shame in how we react. The shame lies in how we act out. Often, we have an unexpected reaction because we are hungry, thirsty, dehydrated, or need a break.

Make the change

We have heard that any change, any routine, takes 21-days to master. You have just enough time to master regular check-ins with yourself before the holiday season ends. (Note: For me, the holiday season doesn’t end until our kiddos return to school.) Set a reminder on your phone, put a sticky note on your steering wheel, add it to your calendar and daily to-do list. Do what you need to do to master this new skill. Understanding why you feel or react a certain way will put you in the driver's seat for 2022.

Sincerely,

Sara O