What is true love?
Love, a topic I often return to, mystifies me. True love, passionate love, love of life, family and friends, what do they all look like, feel like? How do you know if you are giving enough love? These questions often torment me throughout my day. As I look at my beautiful child, I worry if I have loved her enough, hard enough. Has my love sealed in her true identity? Has the love I have given her provided her with the confidence and strength to be who she is meant to be? Has she ever doubted my love?
The questions surrounding my child and love are probably the deepest thoughts and most worry I have when it comes to love. A hopeless romantic, I love to be in love, to fall in love, live through the first exciting moments, and count myself lucky for the experiences. These romances have all occurred with books, movies, and fictional characters. The excitement of romantic love, for me, can be met with a well-written story. These loves are the best, for even when the story ends, a piece of the story remains with me, lodged in the memories of my heart, ready at a moment’s notice to remerge, to fill my heart with joy and love.
Yet, still, I wonder what is true love? For me, true love is the love which wakes with you at 2 am and holds your hand through an illness, the love that cleans the kitchen because they know you need a break, the love that gives you space to fight your demons quietly waiting for you to return, the love who silently sits with you through life’s storms, content to simply share the moment. Those are some of the many qualities which make up true love. It is not the showy love, the flowers, romance, and candles. It is made of the hardy, strong characteristics designed to stand the flow of time, the waves of grief, the harshness life throws at us. It is as pure as the love our pets and children show us, as strong as the love our mothers have for us, and as long-standing as the old oak tree in the center of the forest.
Few examples of such love truly exist. Love this pure is not spoken of, flaunted, or highlighted. It is the love which lives in the shadows, the love that meets challenges head-on, typically has a black eye, comes with the fortitude of an explorer, and flows stronger than the mighty Nile. It is the piece of life we hide, the gem we shield from light, yet it blossoms in our hearts. We long to share it, but our first few attempts usually end so disastrously, we learn to guard it, perhaps even to hide it.
Poets wane on about this love, minstrels strumming their lutes and serenading Europe about the chivalrous nature of it. A few books have been written, some songs, but in truth very few dare to declare this love exists. Words do not contain the depth, strength, and energy to describe it. No, it is felt, in a look, a touch, a kind word. It leaves a lasting mark on all it touches, no one leaves unscathed. Some push it away, afraid to be vulnerable enough to embrace it. But those who have, have discovered the sweetest secret life holds.
Sincerely,
Sara
